Rap Snacks |
Tasty Treats at the Lamar Alpha Express |
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Over by
what used to be the "Coach and Four" hotel
sits what used
to be a gas-station but is now a one stop shop for all
your cellphone, beeper, hair, hot lunch, banking and smoking
needs... the Alpha
Express. On Friday mornings before
work i have made it a weekly ritual to stop by for
a gatoraid or two. Over time i've gotten to know the owners
just
well
enough
to
ask some questions. Below is a list of what i've learned.
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the
dish network offers what is |
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called
an "Arabic Language Package" for 12 bucks
a month. this package includes the now famous "Al-Jazeera"
network. |
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there
are over 200 different types |
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of
"hair" on the back wall. |
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the
owners have yet to sell a |
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winning
lottery ticket to anybody |
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people
don't buy those little |
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"swisher
cigars" for the tobacco that already comes in them. |
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| Now, seeing
how I
could be 40 feet tall, green and saying "ho, ho,
ho" while walking thru the door and not stand out as much
as i already do, i usually try to keep a low profile when i stop
to shop. Therefore, it is important for readers to know just
how much courage it took me to go thru the rack and pick out
one of each of these tasty snacks. In other words, even if you
don't find this particular gallery interesting or amusing, you
have better appreciate the effort. (well, that and the $2.68
i've invested in this bit - that breaks down to 33 cents a bag)
When you are finished with the gallery, please feel free to comment
here. |
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| The
Rap Snack Gallery |
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Master
P |
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No
Limit Recording Artist |
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Platinum
BBQ Chips |
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Advice |
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Start
your own business |
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My
Take |
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I
put this bag first because... |
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1. i've
heard of this guy! |
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2. he
is actually a very successful "artist" and pro-sports
agent... so his "start your own business" mantra carries
some weight to it. |
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3. he
calls baton-rouge, LA home... and being an alabama
fan, i just find that funny. |
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Stat
Quo |
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Shady/Aftermath
Recording Artist |
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Sour
Cream & Extra Cheddar |
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Advice |
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Pursue
your college degree |
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My
Take |
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You
have got to like a guy who calls himself "stat quo"
encouraging peeps to "pursue your college degree" |
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Lil'
Romeo |
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No
Limit Recording Artist |
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BBQ'n
with my Honey |
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Advice |
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Stay
in school |
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My
Take |
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Now
it is my guess that even the typical rv.com reader
has heard of this guy. In addition to his singing career,
he has been in several movies and
has been the host of the Nickelodeon's
"Kids Choice Awards" a time or two. That
is an awful lot for a 14 year old to balance while
"staying in school" |
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side
note: while doing my research on this guy i learned
that he is actually Master P's kid. (see Platinum
BBQ Chips) |
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YoungBloodz |
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Arista
Recording Artist |
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Southern
Crunk BBQ |
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Advice |
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Get
crunk |
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My
Take |
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I
have no idea who these guys are, but i admire the fact
they are not willing to "front" for some good cause
over a bag of chips. Rather than tell peeps to do something
positive... they just say "get crunk". No telling what
that really means, but i doubt it has anything to do
with success, school or starting a business. |
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Baby |
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Cash
Money Recording Artist |
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BBQ'n
w/ my Honey Popcorn |
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Advice |
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Stay
away from guns |
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My
Take |
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While
i don't know who this guy is either, it is my guess
that he is the least "artistically significant" member
of the Rap Snack family due to the fact that his bag
is by far of the cheapest quality. |
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BBD |
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Universal
Recording Artist |
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Back
at the Ranch Chips |
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Advice |
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Education
= Success |
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My
Take |
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I
did a little research at hip-hop
online and found out
that today's
BBD is actually yesterdays Bell, Biv, Devoe. (which
was actually hatched from the band "New Edition" after
Bobby Brown left) Anyway, some of you might remember
them from the early 90's where
they
had some pretty big hits like "End of the Road". I
wonder if being on a potato chip back is what
they had in mind by that. |
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Ms.
Toi |
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Universal
Recording Artist |
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Sweeties
Flavored Chips |
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Advice |
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Respect
Your Self (3 words) |
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My
Take |
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In
addition to breaking the word "yourself" down into
2 easier to understand words, i really like how a woman
who phonetically calls herself "Ms. Toy" instructs
others to "respect them selves". |
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Warren
G |
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Universal
Music Artist |
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Cheezie
Nacho |
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Advice |
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Respect
Your Elders |
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My
Take |
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If
you look real close you can read the graffiti on the
light pole Mr. G is leaning on. (free*fun, cheech 124,
trybe mFm) The richardvining.com staff tried to contact
Mr. G as to the meaning of all this, but he is a little
hard to get a hold of at this time. You see, according
to rapnewsdirect.com, Mr. G is in jail |
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| Additional
Rap Snack Resources |
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www.RapSnacks.com |
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leave
your comments here |
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since
the release of this gallery, it has been found that on the
back of each bag there is an artist bio... |
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so much
for all my "research". oh well, it is always good
to verify a source. just ask dan rather. |
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